Name: Kelevra (Bad Dog) Dragunov
Age: ???
Sex/Gender: Male
Occupation: Ex-Proxy, Free Agent
Weapon: Azoth Suit, Machete, Anything he can get his hands on
Tittle: Dr. Kelevra P.H.D. in Ass Kicking
Favorite Line: Do you like it doggy style?
Theme Song: John Frizzell - My Little Box
Special "Talent": Body is paralyzed, but is still capable of movement. Azoth suit can morph into anything he wants and is capable of becoming solid and turn back to being liquid, at will. Constant telepathic connection with his Azoth Suit.
Fighting Style: Rarely uses it, but is known for using the Monkey-Fu style of fighting.
Main Goal: Causing as much Destruction, as possible.
Status in The Team: Leader of The Aces of Rejects.
This is the basic sheet for my little gang, to who I have been referring to for the past couple of weeks as my "Aces". One of those "Aces" was the one causing all the damage in Germany. You didn't think I was the only "peshka", in this game? Don't be so naive.
Slowly throughout the days, I will be revealing the members of this gang, I think you will like them.
That is all, have a good day.
So you got yourself a little gang too?
ReplyDeleteAt least your group has a name. I just call mine 'The Group' cause I'm so fucking original.
Also the little file thing you put in the beginning about you is a grain of sand compared to your actual file.
-Veigar
Yup, I actually had the plan for organizing this group for a while now, I had to have a way to avoid Marshmallow Man.
DeleteCome on man, step up your game, be a little more creative!
I know man, but I couldn't fill up the whole page with my actual "resume", people would get terrified and eventually, bored reading through all of it.
And I care about The People.
I think Germany would disagree.
DeleteThey're just a bunch of Nazis. Nobody cares about the Nazis.
DeleteAs a song, I give you Stockholm Syndrome by Muse solely from that intro. That is a badass intro.
DeleteUhh, that's the worst line I've ever heard.
They're not Nazi's anymore dipshit. The Germans were not all Nazi's anyway.
DeleteAnd you're worse than most of those Nazi's or at least as bad as the worst of them. So shut the fuck up.
I'll second that. Not all Germans are Nazis, and they're less accepting of that sort of thing than the UK or US, where there are neo-nazi organizations. Get your facts right.
DeleteAll Germans I know are very sensitive to being called Nazis, they really steer clear of that sort of thing. They ain't proud of it.
DeleteHey, ma! Look at me!
DeleteI'm obviously steering up some jimmies over here!
Yup. In Germany they come down like a tonne of bricks; I heard that someone teaching there looked like they were going to do the Nazi salute, and got fired on the spot.
DeleteAlso, 'Steering up some jimmies' is a stupid saying. What is a 'jimmy' anyways? And why is it so directionless to require steering by someone who lacks basic knowledge about Germanic culture?
DeleteWow, I knew you were a guy of such detailed explanations, but I didn't realize that you were such a buzz kill.
DeleteYour life must be boring as fuck.
Yup. Just how I like it. And you haven't said who 'Jimmy' is yet. Is he a literal steer? Or a metaphorical steer?
DeleteJimmies = Underwear
DeleteSteer Up = Something of a wedgie
Get it?
Meh. Figured it was something along those lines, I just prefer to think that you have a cow called Jimmy.
DeleteWere you a farmer boy in the past?
DeleteNope. I just find cows intrinsically hilarious. Especially when I'm a little drunk.
DeleteUmm pHIL? Now is not the time to get shitfaced. Just be careful.
DeleteIt's Morningstar all over again...
ReplyDelete-Rose
Morningstar died again this week.
DeleteAgain? It's beginning to seem like an addiction...
DeleteIt's like a never ending supply of fun, you kill him, he comes back, you kill him, he comes back. Like one of them Nevoliashka's.
DeleteSince I accidentally put it as a comment reply, I'll say it again here.
ReplyDeleteYour favourite line is the worst I've ever heard.
How did you convince people to join you?
Corpses...
DeleteSome of them are merc's who accept jobs for the right pay. Some of them are drawn to me eccentric charm. Some of them don't even think on a human level. Some of them just suddenly appear out of nowhere and help us without any reason.
DeleteBu main point, we're all rejects who became rejects simply because we were following our goals.
Next question.
DeleteWhat are you planning to do with this group?
Oh, you'll see.
DeleteI hate waiting. :( I want to know who I'm hopefully going to kill when I'm older!
DeleteYour naivety knows no bounds, we are talking professionals here, me? I'm no professional, I'm a fanatic, these people?
DeleteCompletely different caliber.
Professionals are just tame fanatics.
DeletePlus I said when I'm older.
Nah professionals never betray.
DeletePlus, what makes you think you will survive til you're older? Getting cocky, not good for your health.
I'm trying to be optimistic, because I've been thinking that every day is my last because I'm worthless and can't fight for shit, see.
DeleteLooks like I have more killing to do.
ReplyDeleteWas that a threat? Or was that your random catchphrase of the day?
DeleteWell then, here's mine: "Time to kick this shit in the gear"
"Ace of fours! The best hand."
ReplyDeleteExactly, not to mention if the player is cheating and has more aces up his sleeve, then it is an unbeatable hand.
DeleteUnbeatable as long as the rest of us play cards
DeleteI personally would punch all the cheating players in the face, tip over the table and run off with the bets before anyone knows what the fuck.
DeleteThen get caught in a dark alley by the same people that you have punched and get taken down, the good old, Tommy Gun style.
DeleteNo one has ever successfully caught me in a dark alley.
DeleteO rly?
DeleteHow about that time when I drugged you with Skittles and let Fiver capture you? Remember? Yeah, I do too, good times.
I was sitting here just thinking of a witty retort and realised I can't think of one because you're right. So I'm just going to call you a wanker and be done with it.
DeleteI have another question, I might tell you later why it's relevant.
What languages do you speak?
He speaks antarctican.
Delete-Veigar