Did I ever tell you how hard it is to get things done when you are cut off from the Path? If there is one thing I miss about being under our tall friends servitude, it's that I had access to the Path, could go anywhere, at any time, albeit not with precise accuracy, it was always risky using it, but so convenient. Sure you'd end up puking your guts out and with the type of head aches that made it feel like your brain was rattling around inside your skull, but hell, it got you where you needed to go, sort of.
So, been a while, world's kind of been going to hell, a lot of terrorist acts happening left and right, wonder what could be the cause for those. Especially here in the great country of United Kingdom, I mean, those couldn't at all be done as means to cover up something more sinister, nah, the public is too busy paying attention to Prince Andrew and his fun adventures over in the US.
It is not at all a means of eliminating the proxy element from the governmental establishments and there is totally no tugs of war happening over who holds the power. And I totally wasn't laying low, because there are literal death squads on the streets, hunting down anyone who had any significant contact with our tall friend and his little, self appointed secretaries.
Things seemingly have calmed down comparatively speaking to a few years ago, from what I hear, that's when the real parties were happening, riots left and right as if it was black Friday every day.
Yeah, travelling is made a bit hard with that type of pressure going on, but hey, who said that gathering allies would be easy, am I right?
"Allies?" I hear you ask. Why yes, allies, in today's day and age you need people who can take a look at your plan and tell you it's shit. That's actually the main reason the Rejects fell apart, they were all pathetic worshippers, none of them questioned my plans, they just followed them, which is not good. I need a second opinion, that much I have learned during my past life, I need people who don't look up to me, or some dumb shit like that.
And I found a perfect candidate... Long time ago. Oh yes, I had this guy in mind for a long time, even before my original death, I mean, at the time, I had different plans for him, things kind of got fucked over and forced me to change the original plan, but it worked out, better than ever too.
Not going to reveal who it is... yet. However, some of you may actually know him and if you don't, even better, you get to meet this charmer for the first time.
After meeting up, we've been trying to smuggle ourselves right the fuck out of the UK, hard to do, flying was a no go. So we took a swim. Did I ever say that human cruelty can be extremely helpful? Man, the things people smuggle in and out of countries, all for some coloured papers, they don't even feed the things they smuggle that often, barely any of our fellow passengers could stand on their feet, they were extremely pale, their eyes sagging, with massive blue bags underneath, so fragile, so tiny and so similar to one another.
We of course had to politely ask the original owners of the delivery service to give us a ride, at first they refused, but after a lot of delightful persuasion on our end, the remaining members of the crew agreed to give us a much needed lift.
Human cruelty can indeed be helpful.
It's funny, those poor things that could barely stand, the ones that were so broken you couldn't even call them human anymore, when they heard the screams of some of the crew members during our... negotiations, that spark of hope in their eyes, that finally somebody had come for them. In any other circumstance I would enjoy snuffing that spark out, there's nothing more beautiful than a person's life draining from their eyes, with the realisation sinking in that this was the final line. It would be nothing personal on my end, it is simply pure entertainment, but alas, my team mate would not approve of this act and so I had to reel it in.
After we got out of the country and arrived to where we need to be, we just left them, I mean, we of course thanked all the remaining crew members for giving us a lift by throwing them a party, the party must have been so good, we never saw their vessel move from the spot in the middle of the ocean where we asked them to stop.
It's actually kind of funny, I don't know why I stopped myself from doing those poor, tiny things the favour of snuffing them out. My team mate, never really told me not to, but due to it being a new partnership, I didn't want to accidentally sully it, however, when we leaped overboard for our 3 hour long swim to the shore, he didn't seem to hesitate. There was no way those tiny things were getting off that vessel alive, they had no strength to swim, no knowledge on how to operate the vessel and there wasn't going to be anyone in sight any time soon to rescue them, they will most certainly die by the time anyone finds them and yet, he seemed to be indifferent to the idea, maybe it never crossed his mind, maybe I should have snuffed them out, would be doing them a favour too.
Oh well, what's done is done, can't change the past.
What if nobody showed up at Armageddon?
Tuesday, December 3, 2019
Sunday, August 4, 2019
Reconnecting with Friends Pt. 2
Alrighty, so I've been tailed for a week now, not really sure by who, but whoever they are, they sure as hell are persistent, could be the sniper from earlier, could be somebody entirely else, whoever they, I hope they know that they're playing with fire.
Anyways, back on topic, while I was away, our dear Minxie provided a write up of our meet up from her perspective, mentioning some things that I myself forgot, or didn't get to, you can feel free to read up on it here.
After playing a rousing game of tag with her in the darkened alley for a few minutes after all the proxies had been dealt with, she was finally able to spot me with the light of her phone, specifically after I muttered: "But then again, friends never forget each other."
Once she spotted me, she immediately dropped the phone on the ground, making sure to use her free hand to steady her rifle on me: “I remember more than ever, 'friend'”
You could hear it in her voice, see it in her eyes, I couldn't believe it, after so many years, she finally utilised his training and teachings to a point where it came natural to her, looking at her, standing there, all ready to blow my brains out without a second thought reminded me of him, I got a bit melancholic even, but only for a second, because my joy was far more overflowing with the fact of how proud I was of her!
And rightfully so, I mean, just looking at the countless acts of murder she committed in those alleys was enough, but hell, it goes further than that, she was fresh from committing arson on one of their bases! Which by the way was my card to use against her, I could hear the sirens in the distance: "I believe I've wasted enough of your time here for the cops to be able to quickly follow the trail of dead bodies and catch you."
After which I offered her my hand with the promise of a quick getaway and an opportunity to catch up with an old friend.
She left me hanging for a bit, as she proceeded to sling her rifle back around her shoulder and then carried on taking the dead proxy's wallets, little scavenger. But eventually she did shake my hand, with a pleasant admittance: “It’s actually nice to see you”
The feeling was very mutual, while we were shaking on it, I asked my darling to open up a sewer grate that was positioned behind me, which she did fairly quickly, after which I stepped aside and waved Minxie to go on in.
She shimmied down the ladder quickly. “You look the same, but kind of different. What’s up with that?” She noticed, my new body, only reason people usually don't, is because they usually have barely any time to take a good look. But yes, this body was different, bigger than the original I had, when I was alive, but I didn't want to go into detail of my rebirth, so I just jokingly remarked that going to the gym has it's benefits, while I was climbing down the ladder.
She didn't take kindly to my sarcastic remark and rattled the ladder whilst I was climbing down. I must admit, it did surprise me, I thought the ladder was about to fall, but of course it didn't and as I climbed down, I promptly let Minxie know that nobody likes smartasses.
"It’s true; even I don’t like me." She was walking in step with me, examining some minor scrapes on her arms. “But.... thanks for your help. I was in some tough shit there. Any idea where we’re going?”
Honestly, I had no idea, my main plan was to just as far as possible from all the commotion upstairs, but I was also looking for a place for us to simply stay put in and relax, so on occasion as we would walk past sewer grates above us, I'd ask my darling to take a peek through the grates, by extending her high up and tell me if where we were.
Whilst I was doing that, I also made sure to keep the conversation going: "No problem, anything for a friend, I gotta say, I'm impressed, you were almost able to get away from them, I specifically liked the fuse box trick."
"Didn’t really see much of what happened after I set it up. Usually I set up barriers and traps like that, but I’ve never electrified one before. Hopefully their deaths were relatively quick and painless..." Such a wasteful wish, in my personal opinion, those losers deserved all the suffering they got for being so careless and full of themselves, I swear, at some points during their chase, they were talking about ascending the ranks due to the deaths of their comrades, pathetic. "Although if you enjoyed it, then they probably weren’t. Well, it was effective. That’s all that really matters." Oh how I wish she would have expressed more enjoy in disposing of such worthless beings, but oh well, at least it doesn't really bother her anymore, which is good, such minuscule creatures shouldn't even take a second of one's thought.
However, I did want to prod a little further "Really Minxie? Quick and painless? No satisfaction at all from the fact that you killed people, who would've later done much harm to someone else who didn't deserve it?" Funnily enough, as I asked that, we've reached a good spot to get out at, so I signalled her to climb up the ladder, whilst still waiting for an answer.
"Of course I feel satisfaction." Minxie began to climb the ladder "In fact, I’m pretty grateful you didn’t intervene until it was totally necessary. You don’t kill-steal like most rescuers do. But I can’t say their suffering in the process would mean much to me. Yet." Ah, so it's the thrill of the hunt, at least, that's what I got from that, the opportunity to learn from one's hardship, it's a good outlook to have, assuming of course that's what she meant. Yet, there was that "yet", I assumed it was some form of doubt lingering around, but in any way.
Once we climbed up, the sirens were fair long distance away from us and right in front of us, was a pub, it was a regular looking pub, nothing special about it. I simply, as a good friend, figured that, that little game of tag Minxie was playing earlier, must have worked up quite the appetite, so this was my treat, which gave us ample opportunity to catch up as well, without any disturbances.
"Give me a second." She unzipped her rucksack, pulled out a hoodie, dissembled the rifle and chucked the components and Colt inside. She took a wipe out of the bag and quickly scrubbed the blood off her face with it, then shrugged on the hoody. "Deep down, I wouldn’t call it doubt so much as just a-" For some reason she cut herself off, still walking alongside me towards the entrance, I could pry but decided not to, whatever made her stop herself, seemed like it was done on purpose and who am I to question people's desires to keep quiet when they feel like it?
I myself put on a slightly simpler disguise, asked my darling to extend the collar of the jacket and cover my head, turning into a pretty long hoody, covering the entire top of my face, after which I began to unwrap my bandages, since they would attract attention. I saw Sanna squinting at me as I unwrapped my bandages, must have been surprised to see the lack of burning marks on my face, that's the beauty of the new body, it's far more physically fit than my old one AND it doesn't look like someone was trying to cook me alive, although I do miss my scars, they were beautiful.
We went inside the pub, picked our seat near a group of teenagers, all playing pool, judging from the conversations they were having amongst each other, those must have been some sort of students, who all were in the same class, or attended same courses, I picked the seat next to them, for a reason, but I will get into that in a bit, firstly, orders had to be placed.
"Haddock and chips, salad side, cider- wait, no, I shouldn’t. Pepsi. Or Coke. Whatever they have. Do you have to eat? Like, is it... medically necessary for you to eat?" Now do you people understand why I call her the Curious Minx? This is how our friendship began, for those of you who are not in the know, when Minxie first started her old blog, I wanted nothing but to torment and then kill her, just for fun really, no deep, personal reason. But despite making my intent clear to her, she couldn't stop asking me questions about all sorts of things, her curiosity in the face of a clear threat and fear intrigued me enough to post-pone my original plan, which eventually turned into this messed up friendship, funny how life is? Also, the answer to her question was that I personally don't need to eat, but this body does.
I went to the bar, to place the order and as funny as it was watching the barkeep give me all sorts of dirty looks over my appearance, it was far more intriguing to keep an eye on Minxie from afar. Even with the promise of a calm get together, she was still on her toes, looking around, I assume she was taking notes of the nearest, possible exits, clever, looks like my lesson of not trusting anyone also stuck around.
Once I got the food, I went back to our table, right past the noisy teens, setting the tray with food on the table, I took my seat and tried to calm her nerves "You need to calm down, if we were being tracked, I would know." I looked at the students playing pool next to us "Enjoy this small moment of normalcy for as long as you can, my gift to you." That's why I chose to sit next to those students, I wanted her to be around normal people for a few minutes, to remind her that there's more out there than constant survival for the sake of survival. I may have admired Sergei, but he's path was he's path, I don't want Minxie to go down that path, not because of how tragic it is, but simply because, I feel that, it simply isn't her. I wanted her to realise, or remind her, that despite all of us being haunted by the supernatural monsters that want to rip us apart, life for others still goes on, ignorant as swans (Until I end existence of course) and because of that, there's more out there, than just survival, I don't know if that got across to her, or not, if it did, she didn't show it.
Then we began to properly catch up about our lives, I will not go into detail about that. I refuse to share, because this was a conversation between two long time friends, what was said at that table is between friends, if Minxie decides to share I won't hold it against her, nothing of utter importance to my plans was said anyway, I just want the only place for this "catch up" to be preserved is our memories.
I will however, share one titbit that amused me greatly, our Minxie outright stumped me. At one point she was asking me about my return and how it was possible, although I've pointed this out before, I felt like I had to point it out to her again, in case she forgot, that the current Kelevra that is using this blog, is not the original, the old me died by Sergei's hands, I simply inherited Kelevra's memories, feelings, goals, everything, to carry on his work. To which she followed up with:
"I’m aware. You ever worry about the original coming back?" I never even thought of that scenario before, it's funny to think about, what WOULD the original Kelevra do if he were to ever meet me, the current Kelevra? Would we try to rip each other's throats out? Would we team up? I guess we'll never find out, unless... you know, he actually returns, which, I don't exactly know how he would pull it off, but crazier shit has happened before.
Time passed, our meal slowly disappeared, the students began to wrap their game up and the pub was nearing closing hours and I guess it was time for us to take our leave as well: "Well, I'm stuffed and I need to run in a few minutes, great things await my doing, care for a short walk?"
As we neared the doors, she asked me: "Great things? You mean bloodshed?" It was weird, when she said it, there was this "amused" tone she would exude, in fact, I picked up on it a while back during our conversation, specifically every time we talked about something violent, it was just less obvious than it was when she asked me that question. It confused me, she seemed to flip flop between not wanting to needlessly hurt anyone, yet still experienced a form of joy when she did.
"Oh most definitely, would you like to be a part of those plans to end everything in existence?" I asked her as seriously as I could, I was curious as to her answer.
She met my stare fearlessly, slinging her bag onto her shoulder. She seemed to be deep in thought "Normally I wouldn’t consider it. Bloodshed can’t exist if you end existence..." doubt in her voice, I was in disbelief, didn't even let her finish.
"Well that's funny, didn't even think you'd entertain the thought..."
"Then why did you ask?"
We continued to walk down the street whilst talking, I could hear sirens in the distance, but they weren't coming closer to us "I was expecting some sort of snarky retort, like you usually do, why the sudden blood lust?" Something was wrong here, inconsistent even.
"Sometimes you have to be around death to know you’re alive. I mean if you’re in this kind of life, you’re stuck. Might as well embrace it. As for your expectations, well - I learned from you more than anyone to stay unpredictable." And there it was, she was throwing me off guard, playing me, legitimately confusing me! I was beaming with pride!
I smacked her on the back as hard as I could in a show of comradery, scheming to take advantage of the situation and protect her interests even if it's your friend. She knew exactly what to say to confuse me, she manipulated the conversation to throw me off guard and if she were to take advantage of that, she'd have a pretty big opening in that moment. But there was one issue with that, it wasn't a guarantee that her attack would succeed, or if it would be effective.
This is when I would divulge my gift to her, what you thought I came to visit an old time friend without bearing gifts? What was the gift? It was the knife she gifted to Sergei right before he took off on his final mission, a knife made from an Archangel's bullet, fully capable of hurting the living shit out of me and my darling, and any Azoth, or any other creature.
When she opened the box, her reaction was priceless "This is..." She was very emotional, her eyes were glassy, but she was strong, held back those tears no problem “Holy fuck. Holy shit. How did you get this? Did you find... what was left?”
Oh I wish, no, the thing is, when Mendella received Sergei's severed arm all those years ago, for some reason he left out the part that it wasn't just holding the tape recorder with Incognito's last hours recorded onto it, it was also holding this knife and so he buried it, along with his arm. So when I dug out the arm to burn it, I found this knife and remembered that this was the gift Minxie gave to Sergei. I figured he'd want her to have it, he's not going to be using it anymore and it gives Minxie a fighting chance against people like Star, or me.
"I’ll gladly take it. Thanks." Her eyes darkened at the mention of Morningstar, for obvious reasons, the scars from the torture he exposed her to were still there, she gripped the knife tightly, good.
"Yes, that's right, that's the feeling you need when confronted with any opponent, not just Morningstar." I began to pat her shoulder, pure hatred for even daring to stand between you and your goals, that's the kind of thought process you need, before going into a deadly confrontation with your enemy, no matter who it is, no matter how stronger they may be, if fear isn't holding you back, nothing can "FUCK FEAR!" I yelled out in the middle of the street, clearly entranced in my own explanation, good thing it was night time.
Funnily enough, she joined me in my optimistic outlook on deadly combat "FUCK FEAR!" she yelled out after me, dare I say, it seemed to be even louder than my own yell, I saw some lights come on in some of the buildings, woops.
And that was that, the last bonding moment between me and her, it was time for me to run, this was arguably the last time we would see each other on such friendly terms, I hope not, but I have a feeling that moving forward, I will be making nothing but enemies, so I offered a fist bump and left her with a final bit of advise "Remember, no decision you make is wrong, even if it seems like it and nobody stands in your way, got it?"
"Got it." Good, she looked determined when she said that, bumped my fist with conviction too.
But then, her eyes began to get misty once again, she zipped up her new gift and spread her arms, after which, she uttered arguably the nicest sentence I had ever received: "We'll always be friends, OK? Even if we're about to kill each other. Us being friends won't get in my way, I assure you. But I can't pretend like you don't know me better than anyone else, or that I'm not who I am today because of you, and I can't pretend that I hate you, or that I wouldn't be sad if you were gone. So, I consider you a friend."
You remember how I said that I choose to feel today? That I can give it up any moment? The only reason I'm "feeling" is because I don't want me and my darling to become just yet, I reserve that moment for the final steps of our plan, so usually I have a pretty strong handle over my emotions, selectively choosing when to allow myself to feel and when not to. This moment? One of the few instances where my handle slipped, looks like the old me's memories were a bit too strong to handle, for a second there, I began to think of myself as the original Kelevra, luckily I got a handle on it pretty quickly, before completely forgetting my newer self.
I embraced her in the hug, whispering into her ear that we will always be friends, no matter what. Then I ran off into the nearest, darkest alley, I didn't want to leave, but I had to, my goals awaited, but before I disappeared I made sure to look back and wave at her, a final goodbye, after which me and my darling took our leave, disappearing into the night.
And that was that, Minxie is on her own path and I'm on my own, will they ever cross again? And will that crossing be on such friendly terms? I don't know, but, I hope they will cross again, no matter on what terms.
Seeing my friend is always a treat.
Thanks Minxie for indulging me.
Anyways, back on topic, while I was away, our dear Minxie provided a write up of our meet up from her perspective, mentioning some things that I myself forgot, or didn't get to, you can feel free to read up on it here.
After playing a rousing game of tag with her in the darkened alley for a few minutes after all the proxies had been dealt with, she was finally able to spot me with the light of her phone, specifically after I muttered: "But then again, friends never forget each other."
Once she spotted me, she immediately dropped the phone on the ground, making sure to use her free hand to steady her rifle on me: “I remember more than ever, 'friend'”
You could hear it in her voice, see it in her eyes, I couldn't believe it, after so many years, she finally utilised his training and teachings to a point where it came natural to her, looking at her, standing there, all ready to blow my brains out without a second thought reminded me of him, I got a bit melancholic even, but only for a second, because my joy was far more overflowing with the fact of how proud I was of her!
And rightfully so, I mean, just looking at the countless acts of murder she committed in those alleys was enough, but hell, it goes further than that, she was fresh from committing arson on one of their bases! Which by the way was my card to use against her, I could hear the sirens in the distance: "I believe I've wasted enough of your time here for the cops to be able to quickly follow the trail of dead bodies and catch you."
After which I offered her my hand with the promise of a quick getaway and an opportunity to catch up with an old friend.
She left me hanging for a bit, as she proceeded to sling her rifle back around her shoulder and then carried on taking the dead proxy's wallets, little scavenger. But eventually she did shake my hand, with a pleasant admittance: “It’s actually nice to see you”
The feeling was very mutual, while we were shaking on it, I asked my darling to open up a sewer grate that was positioned behind me, which she did fairly quickly, after which I stepped aside and waved Minxie to go on in.
She shimmied down the ladder quickly. “You look the same, but kind of different. What’s up with that?” She noticed, my new body, only reason people usually don't, is because they usually have barely any time to take a good look. But yes, this body was different, bigger than the original I had, when I was alive, but I didn't want to go into detail of my rebirth, so I just jokingly remarked that going to the gym has it's benefits, while I was climbing down the ladder.
She didn't take kindly to my sarcastic remark and rattled the ladder whilst I was climbing down. I must admit, it did surprise me, I thought the ladder was about to fall, but of course it didn't and as I climbed down, I promptly let Minxie know that nobody likes smartasses.
"It’s true; even I don’t like me." She was walking in step with me, examining some minor scrapes on her arms. “But.... thanks for your help. I was in some tough shit there. Any idea where we’re going?”
Honestly, I had no idea, my main plan was to just as far as possible from all the commotion upstairs, but I was also looking for a place for us to simply stay put in and relax, so on occasion as we would walk past sewer grates above us, I'd ask my darling to take a peek through the grates, by extending her high up and tell me if where we were.
Whilst I was doing that, I also made sure to keep the conversation going: "No problem, anything for a friend, I gotta say, I'm impressed, you were almost able to get away from them, I specifically liked the fuse box trick."
"Didn’t really see much of what happened after I set it up. Usually I set up barriers and traps like that, but I’ve never electrified one before. Hopefully their deaths were relatively quick and painless..." Such a wasteful wish, in my personal opinion, those losers deserved all the suffering they got for being so careless and full of themselves, I swear, at some points during their chase, they were talking about ascending the ranks due to the deaths of their comrades, pathetic. "Although if you enjoyed it, then they probably weren’t. Well, it was effective. That’s all that really matters." Oh how I wish she would have expressed more enjoy in disposing of such worthless beings, but oh well, at least it doesn't really bother her anymore, which is good, such minuscule creatures shouldn't even take a second of one's thought.
However, I did want to prod a little further "Really Minxie? Quick and painless? No satisfaction at all from the fact that you killed people, who would've later done much harm to someone else who didn't deserve it?" Funnily enough, as I asked that, we've reached a good spot to get out at, so I signalled her to climb up the ladder, whilst still waiting for an answer.
"Of course I feel satisfaction." Minxie began to climb the ladder "In fact, I’m pretty grateful you didn’t intervene until it was totally necessary. You don’t kill-steal like most rescuers do. But I can’t say their suffering in the process would mean much to me. Yet." Ah, so it's the thrill of the hunt, at least, that's what I got from that, the opportunity to learn from one's hardship, it's a good outlook to have, assuming of course that's what she meant. Yet, there was that "yet", I assumed it was some form of doubt lingering around, but in any way.
Once we climbed up, the sirens were fair long distance away from us and right in front of us, was a pub, it was a regular looking pub, nothing special about it. I simply, as a good friend, figured that, that little game of tag Minxie was playing earlier, must have worked up quite the appetite, so this was my treat, which gave us ample opportunity to catch up as well, without any disturbances.
"Give me a second." She unzipped her rucksack, pulled out a hoodie, dissembled the rifle and chucked the components and Colt inside. She took a wipe out of the bag and quickly scrubbed the blood off her face with it, then shrugged on the hoody. "Deep down, I wouldn’t call it doubt so much as just a-" For some reason she cut herself off, still walking alongside me towards the entrance, I could pry but decided not to, whatever made her stop herself, seemed like it was done on purpose and who am I to question people's desires to keep quiet when they feel like it?
I myself put on a slightly simpler disguise, asked my darling to extend the collar of the jacket and cover my head, turning into a pretty long hoody, covering the entire top of my face, after which I began to unwrap my bandages, since they would attract attention. I saw Sanna squinting at me as I unwrapped my bandages, must have been surprised to see the lack of burning marks on my face, that's the beauty of the new body, it's far more physically fit than my old one AND it doesn't look like someone was trying to cook me alive, although I do miss my scars, they were beautiful.
We went inside the pub, picked our seat near a group of teenagers, all playing pool, judging from the conversations they were having amongst each other, those must have been some sort of students, who all were in the same class, or attended same courses, I picked the seat next to them, for a reason, but I will get into that in a bit, firstly, orders had to be placed.
"Haddock and chips, salad side, cider- wait, no, I shouldn’t. Pepsi. Or Coke. Whatever they have. Do you have to eat? Like, is it... medically necessary for you to eat?" Now do you people understand why I call her the Curious Minx? This is how our friendship began, for those of you who are not in the know, when Minxie first started her old blog, I wanted nothing but to torment and then kill her, just for fun really, no deep, personal reason. But despite making my intent clear to her, she couldn't stop asking me questions about all sorts of things, her curiosity in the face of a clear threat and fear intrigued me enough to post-pone my original plan, which eventually turned into this messed up friendship, funny how life is? Also, the answer to her question was that I personally don't need to eat, but this body does.
I went to the bar, to place the order and as funny as it was watching the barkeep give me all sorts of dirty looks over my appearance, it was far more intriguing to keep an eye on Minxie from afar. Even with the promise of a calm get together, she was still on her toes, looking around, I assume she was taking notes of the nearest, possible exits, clever, looks like my lesson of not trusting anyone also stuck around.
Once I got the food, I went back to our table, right past the noisy teens, setting the tray with food on the table, I took my seat and tried to calm her nerves "You need to calm down, if we were being tracked, I would know." I looked at the students playing pool next to us "Enjoy this small moment of normalcy for as long as you can, my gift to you." That's why I chose to sit next to those students, I wanted her to be around normal people for a few minutes, to remind her that there's more out there than constant survival for the sake of survival. I may have admired Sergei, but he's path was he's path, I don't want Minxie to go down that path, not because of how tragic it is, but simply because, I feel that, it simply isn't her. I wanted her to realise, or remind her, that despite all of us being haunted by the supernatural monsters that want to rip us apart, life for others still goes on, ignorant as swans (Until I end existence of course) and because of that, there's more out there, than just survival, I don't know if that got across to her, or not, if it did, she didn't show it.
Then we began to properly catch up about our lives, I will not go into detail about that. I refuse to share, because this was a conversation between two long time friends, what was said at that table is between friends, if Minxie decides to share I won't hold it against her, nothing of utter importance to my plans was said anyway, I just want the only place for this "catch up" to be preserved is our memories.
I will however, share one titbit that amused me greatly, our Minxie outright stumped me. At one point she was asking me about my return and how it was possible, although I've pointed this out before, I felt like I had to point it out to her again, in case she forgot, that the current Kelevra that is using this blog, is not the original, the old me died by Sergei's hands, I simply inherited Kelevra's memories, feelings, goals, everything, to carry on his work. To which she followed up with:
"I’m aware. You ever worry about the original coming back?" I never even thought of that scenario before, it's funny to think about, what WOULD the original Kelevra do if he were to ever meet me, the current Kelevra? Would we try to rip each other's throats out? Would we team up? I guess we'll never find out, unless... you know, he actually returns, which, I don't exactly know how he would pull it off, but crazier shit has happened before.
Time passed, our meal slowly disappeared, the students began to wrap their game up and the pub was nearing closing hours and I guess it was time for us to take our leave as well: "Well, I'm stuffed and I need to run in a few minutes, great things await my doing, care for a short walk?"
As we neared the doors, she asked me: "Great things? You mean bloodshed?" It was weird, when she said it, there was this "amused" tone she would exude, in fact, I picked up on it a while back during our conversation, specifically every time we talked about something violent, it was just less obvious than it was when she asked me that question. It confused me, she seemed to flip flop between not wanting to needlessly hurt anyone, yet still experienced a form of joy when she did.
"Oh most definitely, would you like to be a part of those plans to end everything in existence?" I asked her as seriously as I could, I was curious as to her answer.
She met my stare fearlessly, slinging her bag onto her shoulder. She seemed to be deep in thought "Normally I wouldn’t consider it. Bloodshed can’t exist if you end existence..." doubt in her voice, I was in disbelief, didn't even let her finish.
"Well that's funny, didn't even think you'd entertain the thought..."
"Then why did you ask?"
We continued to walk down the street whilst talking, I could hear sirens in the distance, but they weren't coming closer to us "I was expecting some sort of snarky retort, like you usually do, why the sudden blood lust?" Something was wrong here, inconsistent even.
"Sometimes you have to be around death to know you’re alive. I mean if you’re in this kind of life, you’re stuck. Might as well embrace it. As for your expectations, well - I learned from you more than anyone to stay unpredictable." And there it was, she was throwing me off guard, playing me, legitimately confusing me! I was beaming with pride!
I smacked her on the back as hard as I could in a show of comradery, scheming to take advantage of the situation and protect her interests even if it's your friend. She knew exactly what to say to confuse me, she manipulated the conversation to throw me off guard and if she were to take advantage of that, she'd have a pretty big opening in that moment. But there was one issue with that, it wasn't a guarantee that her attack would succeed, or if it would be effective.
This is when I would divulge my gift to her, what you thought I came to visit an old time friend without bearing gifts? What was the gift? It was the knife she gifted to Sergei right before he took off on his final mission, a knife made from an Archangel's bullet, fully capable of hurting the living shit out of me and my darling, and any Azoth, or any other creature.
When she opened the box, her reaction was priceless "This is..." She was very emotional, her eyes were glassy, but she was strong, held back those tears no problem “Holy fuck. Holy shit. How did you get this? Did you find... what was left?”
Oh I wish, no, the thing is, when Mendella received Sergei's severed arm all those years ago, for some reason he left out the part that it wasn't just holding the tape recorder with Incognito's last hours recorded onto it, it was also holding this knife and so he buried it, along with his arm. So when I dug out the arm to burn it, I found this knife and remembered that this was the gift Minxie gave to Sergei. I figured he'd want her to have it, he's not going to be using it anymore and it gives Minxie a fighting chance against people like Star, or me.
"I’ll gladly take it. Thanks." Her eyes darkened at the mention of Morningstar, for obvious reasons, the scars from the torture he exposed her to were still there, she gripped the knife tightly, good.
"Yes, that's right, that's the feeling you need when confronted with any opponent, not just Morningstar." I began to pat her shoulder, pure hatred for even daring to stand between you and your goals, that's the kind of thought process you need, before going into a deadly confrontation with your enemy, no matter who it is, no matter how stronger they may be, if fear isn't holding you back, nothing can "FUCK FEAR!" I yelled out in the middle of the street, clearly entranced in my own explanation, good thing it was night time.
Funnily enough, she joined me in my optimistic outlook on deadly combat "FUCK FEAR!" she yelled out after me, dare I say, it seemed to be even louder than my own yell, I saw some lights come on in some of the buildings, woops.
And that was that, the last bonding moment between me and her, it was time for me to run, this was arguably the last time we would see each other on such friendly terms, I hope not, but I have a feeling that moving forward, I will be making nothing but enemies, so I offered a fist bump and left her with a final bit of advise "Remember, no decision you make is wrong, even if it seems like it and nobody stands in your way, got it?"
"Got it." Good, she looked determined when she said that, bumped my fist with conviction too.
But then, her eyes began to get misty once again, she zipped up her new gift and spread her arms, after which, she uttered arguably the nicest sentence I had ever received: "We'll always be friends, OK? Even if we're about to kill each other. Us being friends won't get in my way, I assure you. But I can't pretend like you don't know me better than anyone else, or that I'm not who I am today because of you, and I can't pretend that I hate you, or that I wouldn't be sad if you were gone. So, I consider you a friend."
You remember how I said that I choose to feel today? That I can give it up any moment? The only reason I'm "feeling" is because I don't want me and my darling to become just yet, I reserve that moment for the final steps of our plan, so usually I have a pretty strong handle over my emotions, selectively choosing when to allow myself to feel and when not to. This moment? One of the few instances where my handle slipped, looks like the old me's memories were a bit too strong to handle, for a second there, I began to think of myself as the original Kelevra, luckily I got a handle on it pretty quickly, before completely forgetting my newer self.
I embraced her in the hug, whispering into her ear that we will always be friends, no matter what. Then I ran off into the nearest, darkest alley, I didn't want to leave, but I had to, my goals awaited, but before I disappeared I made sure to look back and wave at her, a final goodbye, after which me and my darling took our leave, disappearing into the night.
And that was that, Minxie is on her own path and I'm on my own, will they ever cross again? And will that crossing be on such friendly terms? I don't know, but, I hope they will cross again, no matter on what terms.
Seeing my friend is always a treat.
Thanks Minxie for indulging me.
Wednesday, July 17, 2019
Reconnecting with Friends Pt. 1
See, the awful thing about being blocked off from the Path is that I can't travel from point A to point B with lightning speed, also makes tracking a lot harder, but hey, that's the price I pay in order to prevent guys like Starman, or hell, Slendy himself from tracking me down with ease, can't live an easy life? Make it hard for everybody else, is what I say.
Anyways, onto the topic, after a lot of soul searching here and there, I decided to pay a visit to my dear old friend Minxie, or as she is known here on the blogs, Sanna. Honestly speaking, I've been meaning to drop by her area for a while now, according to the posts she published on her new blog, she went through a lot of changes last time I saw her, so this was promising to be a very interesting visit and boy was it indeed!
Tracking her down was quite the task once I landed in UK, luckily for me, our little Minxie was making quite a lot of noise here and there and while the corporate aspect of the proxy monarchy has been in shambles for quite sometime, some of them still maintain contact with each other from time to time, so a few tortures here, a few interrogations there and most definitely lots of bloodbath everywhere, I was given her last known location. From there on, I just had to keep my ear close to the ground and listen in on any crime reports in the area, lo and behold, reports of a firefight breaking out in the abandoned industrial district rang through the police radio scanner I have installed on my, oh so fancy Android phone, this of course could be a random gang fight, or something else entirely, didn't matter, I had all night to track her down, meaning checking out every report was my best option.
Luckily for me, this turned out to be it, I was so excited to see her again, on my way to the industrial district I was thinking of all sorts of elaborate entrances, in order to surprise her, but those ideas were cut short, because I stumbled into the middle of a chase happening. Our dear Minxie, running through the alleys of the industrial district, some type of rifle slung on her back, bag on her side and a gun on her leg, she was definitely going to run out of breath pretty quickly with all that hardware hanging off of her. Only one Proxy was chasing after her, but I could see a group of them in other alleys, they must have split up and this one unlucky bastard was the one to stumble upon her, the rooftops were a good view, I could see everything from up there.
The proxy that was chasing her, started to open fire upon our little Minxie, sounded and looked like a revolver, one shot, no matter where, could have done her in, I could interfere and help her out, but I wanted to see how our little Minxie managed to survive for so long on her own and survive she did, she was able to avoid all the shots the proxy was trying to land and once he was out of bullets, she mowed him down with a gun of her own. Of course the fire fight alerted the group of others, so they all started to zero in, the ones that were the closest, were these 4 proxies that were nearby already, instead of running, our Minxie took some scrap corrugated metal from the side of the alley and put it across as a small barrier, I was trying to figure out what she was trying to do and then it hit me the second she started to approach a battered junction box that was only a few meters away. She took a frayed wire from the junction box by the covered part, trying to bring it to the barrier. However, the wire wasn't long enough, while she was mingling with all of that, the 4 were slowly closing in, having slowed down after finding their friend's dead body, taking it step by step, fearing that they might meet the same fate as their friend. Minxie meanwhile gets a water bottle from her bag, hastily unscrewing it and pouring out the rest of the distance to the barrier, after which she starts running, the sound of her running alerting the other four, making them hastily give chase, the ran towards the barrier, giving it no mind, they grabbed onto it and BOOM, they were all stuck there, holding onto it, their muscles contracting due to the shock and causing them to grip it tighter. As the pain sets in they begin screaming through clenched teeth, skin slowly bubbling, reddening, and then darkening and distorting. It was brutal, violent and oh so beautiful, so far I was impressed, but the chase wasn't over just yet.
She ran towards an intersection in the alleys, where all of them meet and down one of them, she could see a fire getting lit, Molotov cocktails, two proxies are preparing to burn her alive, sucks from that that our Minxie had the same idea in mind, before one of them could even throw the burning bottle, she opened fire at the source of the light with her smaller gun, three shots is all it took to hit her target, the bottle burst into flame right in the proxies hand, lighting him on fire, the other proxy who didn't light his bottle yet got bombarded by the glass, causing him to drop his bottle, which in turn caused the liquid to spill all over the ground where the both of them were standing, fire now catching both of them and erupting to such an extent that it completely blocked off that alley entrance, the smell of burning flesh and gargling screams was like music to my ears.
At this point I got a bit closer, changing my position from the rooftops, to a fire escape, at the alley entrance where other 2 proxies were closing in on her. I guess Minxie figured she could take on both of them, after all, they were rushing at her with no weapons in hand, she started running towards them, whilst opening fire, one of the proxies collapsed on the ground and as Minxie approached the body, a fatal mistake was made, the shot didn't actually connect, the proxy was playing dead and as she passed him, he caught her by surprise, tripping her up, wrestling the gun away from her and pinning her down to the ground, whilst pointing her own gun at her head. The second proxy ran up and they both start chatting away, which was their mistake, with prey this deadly? You don't fuck around, you pull the trigger when you get the chance, case in point, I jumped over the railing of the fire escape and started to plummet down towards them, my darling grabbing onto the railing, making sure to prevent me from actually hitting the ground.
BAM! Lodged one of spiked sleeves right into the back of the one's who was on top of Sanna with the gun, head. Blood splattering all over Sanna and his friend, few seconds of silence, shock, fear. surprise, all sorts of emotions could be seen running through the both of them. At that point, I could have stayed and helped her finish the job, but the thing is, is that she didn't trust me and I didn't to force a fight between us, yet. So I made sure to remove myself and my newly made, lodged onto my arm friend, disappear as I asked my darling to retract me back onto the balcony. As I ascended back to the balcony with my new dead friend, the gun that he was threatening Minxie with earlier fell out of his hand somewhere on the ground near Minxie and the other Proxy, I was also about to pass the lamp that was the only source of light for that intersection of the alley, using my newly made friend as an off switch, I bashed his dead body against the light, breaking it, making it pitch dark both for Minxie and the other surviving proxy. Once I got back to the balcony, I said farewell to my dead friend and dropped him back to the ground near, starling his friend who was still breathing, then I perched up on the railing and got ready to enjoy the rest of the show.
The terrified Proxy, immediately went for the gun, just about grabbing it with his shaking hands. While he was occupied, our Minxie kneed him in the groin and rolled out from under him, then slammed a fist into the side of his jaw. It cracked grotesquely as it broke to the left side, music to my ears. She got to her feet while he was incapacitated, balancing, then using the darkness to slip behind the slight cover of the fire exit stairs. She stayed silent, waiting, slowly drawing the rifle she had on her back this entire time. The proxy, or the idiot in this case pulled out his phone using it as a flashlight of sorts, instantly giving away his position and giving our Minxie a free shot and she takes it with no hesitation, splattering his brains all over the alley, absolutely beautiful, I was satisfied, this was a great showcase of how far she had gotten, it was time to try and talk to her, which wouldn't be easy, considering she just finished murdering people left and right and was high on adrenaline.
But I believe I'll get to that part in the next post, I need to start moving towards my next destination, I took long enough time to write this up.
Anyways, onto the topic, after a lot of soul searching here and there, I decided to pay a visit to my dear old friend Minxie, or as she is known here on the blogs, Sanna. Honestly speaking, I've been meaning to drop by her area for a while now, according to the posts she published on her new blog, she went through a lot of changes last time I saw her, so this was promising to be a very interesting visit and boy was it indeed!
Tracking her down was quite the task once I landed in UK, luckily for me, our little Minxie was making quite a lot of noise here and there and while the corporate aspect of the proxy monarchy has been in shambles for quite sometime, some of them still maintain contact with each other from time to time, so a few tortures here, a few interrogations there and most definitely lots of bloodbath everywhere, I was given her last known location. From there on, I just had to keep my ear close to the ground and listen in on any crime reports in the area, lo and behold, reports of a firefight breaking out in the abandoned industrial district rang through the police radio scanner I have installed on my, oh so fancy Android phone, this of course could be a random gang fight, or something else entirely, didn't matter, I had all night to track her down, meaning checking out every report was my best option.
Luckily for me, this turned out to be it, I was so excited to see her again, on my way to the industrial district I was thinking of all sorts of elaborate entrances, in order to surprise her, but those ideas were cut short, because I stumbled into the middle of a chase happening. Our dear Minxie, running through the alleys of the industrial district, some type of rifle slung on her back, bag on her side and a gun on her leg, she was definitely going to run out of breath pretty quickly with all that hardware hanging off of her. Only one Proxy was chasing after her, but I could see a group of them in other alleys, they must have split up and this one unlucky bastard was the one to stumble upon her, the rooftops were a good view, I could see everything from up there.
The proxy that was chasing her, started to open fire upon our little Minxie, sounded and looked like a revolver, one shot, no matter where, could have done her in, I could interfere and help her out, but I wanted to see how our little Minxie managed to survive for so long on her own and survive she did, she was able to avoid all the shots the proxy was trying to land and once he was out of bullets, she mowed him down with a gun of her own. Of course the fire fight alerted the group of others, so they all started to zero in, the ones that were the closest, were these 4 proxies that were nearby already, instead of running, our Minxie took some scrap corrugated metal from the side of the alley and put it across as a small barrier, I was trying to figure out what she was trying to do and then it hit me the second she started to approach a battered junction box that was only a few meters away. She took a frayed wire from the junction box by the covered part, trying to bring it to the barrier. However, the wire wasn't long enough, while she was mingling with all of that, the 4 were slowly closing in, having slowed down after finding their friend's dead body, taking it step by step, fearing that they might meet the same fate as their friend. Minxie meanwhile gets a water bottle from her bag, hastily unscrewing it and pouring out the rest of the distance to the barrier, after which she starts running, the sound of her running alerting the other four, making them hastily give chase, the ran towards the barrier, giving it no mind, they grabbed onto it and BOOM, they were all stuck there, holding onto it, their muscles contracting due to the shock and causing them to grip it tighter. As the pain sets in they begin screaming through clenched teeth, skin slowly bubbling, reddening, and then darkening and distorting. It was brutal, violent and oh so beautiful, so far I was impressed, but the chase wasn't over just yet.
She ran towards an intersection in the alleys, where all of them meet and down one of them, she could see a fire getting lit, Molotov cocktails, two proxies are preparing to burn her alive, sucks from that that our Minxie had the same idea in mind, before one of them could even throw the burning bottle, she opened fire at the source of the light with her smaller gun, three shots is all it took to hit her target, the bottle burst into flame right in the proxies hand, lighting him on fire, the other proxy who didn't light his bottle yet got bombarded by the glass, causing him to drop his bottle, which in turn caused the liquid to spill all over the ground where the both of them were standing, fire now catching both of them and erupting to such an extent that it completely blocked off that alley entrance, the smell of burning flesh and gargling screams was like music to my ears.
At this point I got a bit closer, changing my position from the rooftops, to a fire escape, at the alley entrance where other 2 proxies were closing in on her. I guess Minxie figured she could take on both of them, after all, they were rushing at her with no weapons in hand, she started running towards them, whilst opening fire, one of the proxies collapsed on the ground and as Minxie approached the body, a fatal mistake was made, the shot didn't actually connect, the proxy was playing dead and as she passed him, he caught her by surprise, tripping her up, wrestling the gun away from her and pinning her down to the ground, whilst pointing her own gun at her head. The second proxy ran up and they both start chatting away, which was their mistake, with prey this deadly? You don't fuck around, you pull the trigger when you get the chance, case in point, I jumped over the railing of the fire escape and started to plummet down towards them, my darling grabbing onto the railing, making sure to prevent me from actually hitting the ground.
BAM! Lodged one of spiked sleeves right into the back of the one's who was on top of Sanna with the gun, head. Blood splattering all over Sanna and his friend, few seconds of silence, shock, fear. surprise, all sorts of emotions could be seen running through the both of them. At that point, I could have stayed and helped her finish the job, but the thing is, is that she didn't trust me and I didn't to force a fight between us, yet. So I made sure to remove myself and my newly made, lodged onto my arm friend, disappear as I asked my darling to retract me back onto the balcony. As I ascended back to the balcony with my new dead friend, the gun that he was threatening Minxie with earlier fell out of his hand somewhere on the ground near Minxie and the other Proxy, I was also about to pass the lamp that was the only source of light for that intersection of the alley, using my newly made friend as an off switch, I bashed his dead body against the light, breaking it, making it pitch dark both for Minxie and the other surviving proxy. Once I got back to the balcony, I said farewell to my dead friend and dropped him back to the ground near, starling his friend who was still breathing, then I perched up on the railing and got ready to enjoy the rest of the show.
The terrified Proxy, immediately went for the gun, just about grabbing it with his shaking hands. While he was occupied, our Minxie kneed him in the groin and rolled out from under him, then slammed a fist into the side of his jaw. It cracked grotesquely as it broke to the left side, music to my ears. She got to her feet while he was incapacitated, balancing, then using the darkness to slip behind the slight cover of the fire exit stairs. She stayed silent, waiting, slowly drawing the rifle she had on her back this entire time. The proxy, or the idiot in this case pulled out his phone using it as a flashlight of sorts, instantly giving away his position and giving our Minxie a free shot and she takes it with no hesitation, splattering his brains all over the alley, absolutely beautiful, I was satisfied, this was a great showcase of how far she had gotten, it was time to try and talk to her, which wouldn't be easy, considering she just finished murdering people left and right and was high on adrenaline.
But I believe I'll get to that part in the next post, I need to start moving towards my next destination, I took long enough time to write this up.
Saturday, February 23, 2019
Opportunities
Opportunities present themselves all the time, most of the time, they present themselves at either very convenient, or coincidental times.
For example, just recently Knitty and Starman had a little bit of a get together between themselves. It was nice and sweet, and pleasant, and is a definite recommendation from yours truly, to make sure to read up on that meeting. It acts as a perfect study into the minds of those monsters that have been haunting and hunting you for years now, looking at you Minxie.
But recommendations is not the reason I refer to those posts, the reason I refer to them, is because Starman seems to have caught onto my plan in achieving my ultimate goal. Now admittedly, this plan, wasn't the original plan I've had prior to my visit to the Wolf Pack. My original plan (Which is still in place) was going to take a lot longer time to put into motion, but Knitty's resurrection, has presented me with an opportunity to save myself some time, simply skip several steps within my original plan and use the doorway that Knitty's resurrection left behind. A doorway, that would have taken me a lot longer to find and get access to otherwise.
This turn of events, in turn, present Knitty with an opportunity to skip the time consumption of tracking me down, in order to get revenge for what I had done during my previous visit to her family and just in general, stop me from achieving my goal, because the results of my goal, stand in stark contrast to her own. Now, she doesn't even have to track me down, she knows I'll be coming to her at some point, all she has to do is prepare for my visit.
Which in turn, grants me the opportunity to prepare and plan my visit for as long as I want, since I know she won't be coming after me, can't afford it, since I can drop by any day, any minute, any second and if she's not there and is somewhere else, chasing ghosts, well... game over man.
See, opportunities, present new opportunities, it's amazing really, but not all opportunities are fortunate, take for example the attempt on my life recently. I've been taking it easy these past few weeks, healing up all the wounds within this human body, as well as making sure that Starmans left overs were completely gone from my system and not influencing me any longer. I was getting a bit tired of the drowning memories, which all caused uncontrollable rage and despair, Starman's demons are his own to keep, I don't want none of them, such distractions are not welcome.
Along with my healing, I was also planning a little trip and slowly, arranging everything necessary for that trip to happen, when all of a sudden, a bullet tears into my shoulder, which was delivered from a nearby rooftop, via sniper rifle. My darling reacted quickly, she prevented the bullet from reaching the body's shoulder bone, but not quick enough to gather enough strength to prevent the bullets insertion. Nevertheless, the benefit of being in the driver seat of this human body, is that you feel everything it feels, so the pain jolted me very quickly into movement, rolling off the bed and scampering towards the door, away from the window, leading me into the hallway of this apartment complex I was staying in.
I scrambled towards the rooftop, whilst running, my darling covered my entire body in herself, solidifying herself, turning her into armor of sorts, to prevent any further bullet insertions. She also caught a glimpse of the shooter through the window when I was running off towards the hallway, she told me she caught the silhouette of the person that took the shot, appeared to be human, looked like they were wearing a trench coat and a fedora (What is it with people and their trench coats and fedoras, am I missing a discount sale somewhere?). However, once I made it to the roof of the apartment complex and had the perfect view of the neighboring rooftop, I didn't see the shooter, instead I saw our tall and faceless friend, standing in the exact spot, where Fortissimo says, the shooter was.
I took a few minutes to look at Slender, he's been dogging me for quite some time now, I don't know why he hasn't attacked yet, I highly doubt this little exercise in target practice was of his doing, question is however, whether the shooter is working for Slender, or is somebody completely unrelated. These days, there are so many unknown players running around out there that are shrouded in mystery, it's pointless to ask such questions, all you can do, is wait for the answers.
Looking at Slender, I began to feel a tingling sensation coming over me, yeah no, I don't want to hear your whispers, nor your songs, I don't understand how Knitty or Star could stand those for so long, let alone appreciate them. Back when I served, I found them to be annoying, on the occasion that I would hear them.
So I took my leave, looking for a new place to stay for the time being.
So in short, be read to welcome an opportunity, but always be vary of other opportunities it may open up to others.
For example, just recently Knitty and Starman had a little bit of a get together between themselves. It was nice and sweet, and pleasant, and is a definite recommendation from yours truly, to make sure to read up on that meeting. It acts as a perfect study into the minds of those monsters that have been haunting and hunting you for years now, looking at you Minxie.
But recommendations is not the reason I refer to those posts, the reason I refer to them, is because Starman seems to have caught onto my plan in achieving my ultimate goal. Now admittedly, this plan, wasn't the original plan I've had prior to my visit to the Wolf Pack. My original plan (Which is still in place) was going to take a lot longer time to put into motion, but Knitty's resurrection, has presented me with an opportunity to save myself some time, simply skip several steps within my original plan and use the doorway that Knitty's resurrection left behind. A doorway, that would have taken me a lot longer to find and get access to otherwise.
This turn of events, in turn, present Knitty with an opportunity to skip the time consumption of tracking me down, in order to get revenge for what I had done during my previous visit to her family and just in general, stop me from achieving my goal, because the results of my goal, stand in stark contrast to her own. Now, she doesn't even have to track me down, she knows I'll be coming to her at some point, all she has to do is prepare for my visit.
Which in turn, grants me the opportunity to prepare and plan my visit for as long as I want, since I know she won't be coming after me, can't afford it, since I can drop by any day, any minute, any second and if she's not there and is somewhere else, chasing ghosts, well... game over man.
See, opportunities, present new opportunities, it's amazing really, but not all opportunities are fortunate, take for example the attempt on my life recently. I've been taking it easy these past few weeks, healing up all the wounds within this human body, as well as making sure that Starmans left overs were completely gone from my system and not influencing me any longer. I was getting a bit tired of the drowning memories, which all caused uncontrollable rage and despair, Starman's demons are his own to keep, I don't want none of them, such distractions are not welcome.
Along with my healing, I was also planning a little trip and slowly, arranging everything necessary for that trip to happen, when all of a sudden, a bullet tears into my shoulder, which was delivered from a nearby rooftop, via sniper rifle. My darling reacted quickly, she prevented the bullet from reaching the body's shoulder bone, but not quick enough to gather enough strength to prevent the bullets insertion. Nevertheless, the benefit of being in the driver seat of this human body, is that you feel everything it feels, so the pain jolted me very quickly into movement, rolling off the bed and scampering towards the door, away from the window, leading me into the hallway of this apartment complex I was staying in.
I scrambled towards the rooftop, whilst running, my darling covered my entire body in herself, solidifying herself, turning her into armor of sorts, to prevent any further bullet insertions. She also caught a glimpse of the shooter through the window when I was running off towards the hallway, she told me she caught the silhouette of the person that took the shot, appeared to be human, looked like they were wearing a trench coat and a fedora (What is it with people and their trench coats and fedoras, am I missing a discount sale somewhere?). However, once I made it to the roof of the apartment complex and had the perfect view of the neighboring rooftop, I didn't see the shooter, instead I saw our tall and faceless friend, standing in the exact spot, where Fortissimo says, the shooter was.
I took a few minutes to look at Slender, he's been dogging me for quite some time now, I don't know why he hasn't attacked yet, I highly doubt this little exercise in target practice was of his doing, question is however, whether the shooter is working for Slender, or is somebody completely unrelated. These days, there are so many unknown players running around out there that are shrouded in mystery, it's pointless to ask such questions, all you can do, is wait for the answers.
Looking at Slender, I began to feel a tingling sensation coming over me, yeah no, I don't want to hear your whispers, nor your songs, I don't understand how Knitty or Star could stand those for so long, let alone appreciate them. Back when I served, I found them to be annoying, on the occasion that I would hear them.
So I took my leave, looking for a new place to stay for the time being.
So in short, be read to welcome an opportunity, but always be vary of other opportunities it may open up to others.
Wednesday, January 2, 2019
Old Friend
Welp, I think I'm alright now, whatever that shit was, seems to have went away, or at least subdued to a great length, who would have thought that all I needed was a little heart to heart. Ordinarily, if I was looking for a heart to heart, back in my previous life, I would seek out Rose, that woman had a magical amount of patience and absolutely no disdain for anything, or anyone, but she's dead.
I could go to Knitty, but: 1. She already has a guest planned; 2. Something tells me, there'd be less talking and more fighting on my second visit.
Of course I could visit Minxie, which I am eventually planning on doing, don't you worry Minxie. But considering she has her own inner turmoil going on right now, that she needs to figure out, not an ideal person to visit, for a therapeutic talk. Besides, I want my visit to her to be fun, not some boring conversation about personal beliefs and philosophies.
No, what I needed, is to talk to someone who I had a deep understanding of. Thing I didn't tell all of you before, is when I paid my visit to Mendella on his farm, the information on my darling's captors wasn't the only thing I asked for, I also asked for the location of the burial spot, the burial spot of what remained of him, after Slendy, presumably ripped him to shreds, leaving only his arm behind.
That's right, Mendella gave him a make-shift burial, in butt fuck nowhere, no fancy graves, no nothing, which is fitting, Incognito always wanted to be off the radar. So I visited the location, not empty handed of course, prior to my visit, I made sure to remove any information that was available on Incognito within various networks, Dimir's computer was a big help in that regard. Printed out last bits of information which were stored on that computer, deleted them and brought the physical copies to his "grave". The files included information about his past, his service within the government, family, everything of relevance basically, I put them in a nice pile and burned them right then and there, making a small little camp fire.
We talked about lots of things, the good times, the bad times, how I managed to get under his skin and how he got under mine, I spent good 5 hours there, sitting under that tree, looking up at the stars, all the while talking to a dead man.
One VERY relevant topic I tackled with him, is what Dimir said, that my fascination with Incognito came from the deep understanding that he was in a very similar position that I was. We both had unrealistically, unreachable goals and we both had the drive to ignore that fact and still strive for them. Now I can't say for sure whether that was the true reason as to why my human self, back then, found such fascination with the man, but looking back on it, it must have been the case, since there is ultimately nothing else that ties me to this man. Maybe my past self felt lonely, in his pursuit of his goal and once he saw Sergei, who had a completely different goal, but a similar dilemma, he saw a brother in arms. I can't say, because this is new me, whatever thoughts I was left with from my previous life, do not answer this question.
All my previous self left me in regards to Incognito, are the memories of their encounters and feelings of respect and admiration, that's it. And those are the left over feelings Dimir targeted in his attempt to get to me, I'm not saying mean words from a crippled old man was the reason I was acting off, these past few days, no, I'm convinced that state came from our confrontation with Starman, Dimir just added fuel to the fire, so it was very important to face those left over feelings and understand that they are there and it's not yet the time to get rid of them entirely and I'm happy I could do it right next to his grave.
After our long conversation ended, I dug up whatever remains were still intact and threw them into the fire.
Now, he is completely gone from this world, except that little blog he left behind, I could delete it, but I don't want to completely erase the memory of the man, funny coming from me right? A guy hell bent on erasing everything and everyone. But the existence of that blog, kind of highlights perfectly the reason why I do what I do, somebody, some day, will stumble upon his blog and disregard it as some goofy writings of an internet user, perfectly highlighting the pointlessness of it all.
Overall, I'm glad to be out of Russia.
I could go to Knitty, but: 1. She already has a guest planned; 2. Something tells me, there'd be less talking and more fighting on my second visit.
Of course I could visit Minxie, which I am eventually planning on doing, don't you worry Minxie. But considering she has her own inner turmoil going on right now, that she needs to figure out, not an ideal person to visit, for a therapeutic talk. Besides, I want my visit to her to be fun, not some boring conversation about personal beliefs and philosophies.
No, what I needed, is to talk to someone who I had a deep understanding of. Thing I didn't tell all of you before, is when I paid my visit to Mendella on his farm, the information on my darling's captors wasn't the only thing I asked for, I also asked for the location of the burial spot, the burial spot of what remained of him, after Slendy, presumably ripped him to shreds, leaving only his arm behind.
That's right, Mendella gave him a make-shift burial, in butt fuck nowhere, no fancy graves, no nothing, which is fitting, Incognito always wanted to be off the radar. So I visited the location, not empty handed of course, prior to my visit, I made sure to remove any information that was available on Incognito within various networks, Dimir's computer was a big help in that regard. Printed out last bits of information which were stored on that computer, deleted them and brought the physical copies to his "grave". The files included information about his past, his service within the government, family, everything of relevance basically, I put them in a nice pile and burned them right then and there, making a small little camp fire.
We talked about lots of things, the good times, the bad times, how I managed to get under his skin and how he got under mine, I spent good 5 hours there, sitting under that tree, looking up at the stars, all the while talking to a dead man.
One VERY relevant topic I tackled with him, is what Dimir said, that my fascination with Incognito came from the deep understanding that he was in a very similar position that I was. We both had unrealistically, unreachable goals and we both had the drive to ignore that fact and still strive for them. Now I can't say for sure whether that was the true reason as to why my human self, back then, found such fascination with the man, but looking back on it, it must have been the case, since there is ultimately nothing else that ties me to this man. Maybe my past self felt lonely, in his pursuit of his goal and once he saw Sergei, who had a completely different goal, but a similar dilemma, he saw a brother in arms. I can't say, because this is new me, whatever thoughts I was left with from my previous life, do not answer this question.
All my previous self left me in regards to Incognito, are the memories of their encounters and feelings of respect and admiration, that's it. And those are the left over feelings Dimir targeted in his attempt to get to me, I'm not saying mean words from a crippled old man was the reason I was acting off, these past few days, no, I'm convinced that state came from our confrontation with Starman, Dimir just added fuel to the fire, so it was very important to face those left over feelings and understand that they are there and it's not yet the time to get rid of them entirely and I'm happy I could do it right next to his grave.
After our long conversation ended, I dug up whatever remains were still intact and threw them into the fire.
Now, he is completely gone from this world, except that little blog he left behind, I could delete it, but I don't want to completely erase the memory of the man, funny coming from me right? A guy hell bent on erasing everything and everyone. But the existence of that blog, kind of highlights perfectly the reason why I do what I do, somebody, some day, will stumble upon his blog and disregard it as some goofy writings of an internet user, perfectly highlighting the pointlessness of it all.
Overall, I'm glad to be out of Russia.
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